We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
