Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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