Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize