super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
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