i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
