Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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