You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
be right there i have to get my cape
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Randomize
