Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
