so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
