I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Randomize
