the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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