Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Randomize
