apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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