i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
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