you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
