living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
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