you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize