K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
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