that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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