Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
