hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
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