3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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