Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
