my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
