i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Randomize
