i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize