Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Randomize
