I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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