omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
