Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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