Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
