Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize