Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
