can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
