so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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