Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
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