So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Randomize
