sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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