when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
