the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
my vag is so smooth its legendary
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
