we have officially lost it.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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