Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
