You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
