i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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