Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
