you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
We're too hungover to prance.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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