Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
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