just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
