life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
