I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize