yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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