I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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